Ever Seen “Batteries Not Included?” …Well These Are Way Cooler.

Its like they're staring into my soul with those blue lights.

Every time I walk through one of our local malls, there’s always a kiosk or a store that is demoing those Quadricopters that you link and control with your iPhone or iPad, and every time I think how cool it would be to have one but it would never do the things I want it to do. But these things…oh man, the childish things I would do with these things would embarrass even myself.

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Happy Saturday, Go Niners! Here’s a Video Montage of Gatling Guns!

AMERICA!!!!!

Happy Saturday from Wrecked! Go Niners! Have fun watching a video montage of Gatling Guns with some Metallica in the background.

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Stabbing at a House Party…Oddly Entertaining.

SHE"S FREAKED THE FUCK OUT!!!!!

Watch the video after the break, it’s a little dark and grainy, don’t worry, not too graphic. You can JUST BARELY make the out the stabbing, but what happens just before, and pretty much everything after is pretty hilarious.

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Jeb Corliss’ Life Is Cooler Than Yours

Hey Ladies

Even though I don’t own one and don’t really do anything (sadly) making it worth having, I have LOVED the GoPro video camera since they came out, simply because it gives us videos like this.

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I had sex with Derek Jeter and all I got was this stupid gift basket.

Not the actual gift basket, trust me, I looked, but still THANKS FOR THE SEX JETER!

Derek Jeter is either a huge pimp and ladies man or a huge egotistical douchebag, ASIDE from that, after he has a one night stand with a woman, as a thank you/payment/insult, he gives them a gift basket of autographed Yankees swag. SERIOUSLY!?!?

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There’s a Fine Line Between Genius and Insanity – Theo Jansen Walks That Line Like a Pro.

How many of you remember K’NEX or Erector sets? That shit was so awesome, but so frustrating at the same time cause probably every Erector set I ever got was missing at least one bolt or one beam and I could never finish it. If only I could have been more like this guy.

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DEAD ON ARRIVAL: What happened to you Metallica? You used to be cool.

This Dead on Arrival is a little different, normally done about an album, game or movie. This time, about four concerts that haven’t even happened yet. Say whaaaat?!

Metallica’s 30th anniversary is this year, and to celebrate they will be playing four shows December 5th, 7th, 9th and 10th at the Fillmore for $6 a show or $19.81(get it?) for all four. Really? One of the biggest metal bands of all time, playing shows at a historic intimate venue and I don’t have to max out my credit card? Sounds pretty fucking awesome! Wait…What’s the catch?

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Bioshock Movie Teaser Trailer? I hope so!

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What’s Your Morning Commute Like?

A friend of mine posted this video the other day and it blew my fucking mind. So many of us complain about our commutes to work be it drive time, traffic or whatever it may be. Am I going to make my BART train in time? IF I get on there in time, will there be a seat available so I can sit and kill time playing my DS or smartphone game so the ride doesn’t suck? Who knows!? Imagine this climb being your morning commute every morning.

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BAMF Spotlight: Potential Threat

Every week, Wrecked will be highlighting bands playing the upcoming Bay Area Metal Festival. This week we introduce the hard-hitting Potential Threat from Redwood City, CA.

For fans of Metallica, Megadeth and Slayer

This band reminds of the glory days of metal before people argued about breakdowns, before people “danced” in “mosh pits” and before Hetfield quit drinking. This band has very solid, no-bull shit metal sound. Lots of heavy riffs, seamless transitions and the perfect sound for drinking whiskey straight from the bottle. Seriously, I’m writing this at 11:00am and I’m sitting here thinking a quick swig would be nice before this song ends.

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BAMF Spotlight: Chained Existence

Every week, Wrecked will be highlighting bands playing the upcoming Bay Area Metal Festival. This week we bring you the pummeling Chained Existence from Mendocino, CA. 

For fans of old school thrash, metal, etc.

Do you remember the glory days of when punkers and metal heads united under the common umbrella of pissed off, grungy thrash with group chants and a fuck-you attitude? Chained Existence does. These guys are taking it upon themselves to bring back the energy that’s so easily forgotten with many contemporary bands. You’ll find some face melting solos, circle-pit inducing speed, and some nasty gutteral low growls to go along with all the headbanging you’ll be doing. This is the kind of thrash you expect on the newest edition of Songs to Induce Bar Fight Related Comas To, coming soon to your favorite family record store (if those existed anymore). If you’re looking to get plastered and fight people this weekend, but were a bit concerned by a lack of music to go along with it, have no fear, Chained Existence is here.

Find out more below.

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BAMF Spotlight: Kinetik

Every week, Wrecked will be highlighting bands playing the upcoming Bay Area Metal Festival. This week we give you the tech-metal tyrants, Kinetik, from San Jose, CA. 

kinetik bamfFor fans of: Meshuggah, Sikth, Textures, Mnemic, Between the Buried & Me, etc…

Kinetik is a very technical and heavy metal band formed in 2007 in San Jose. Their sound is very thick and is very reminiscent of Meshuggah and Sikth, and seriously “Damn, that’s some fucking metal” was my reaction after hearing Kinetik for the first time. Each song starts with an awesome, in your face technical riff that’s pretty much designed to rip your balls off and would be best listened to during the good parts of any Michael Bay movie….explosions, guns, chicks and….over priced special effects? So if you’re looking for a dose of some down-tuned math metal, with some franticly aggressive vocals, look no further than the band on this page. These guys have a sound that can truly grab you by the throat, so make sure not to miss these guys at BAMF this July.

Click the jump to hear some of the wrath Kinetik will bring you..

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BAMF Spotlight: Something Left Unsaid

Every week, Wrecked will be highlighting 2-3 bands playing the upcoming Bay Area Metal Festival. Hold onto your pants, because you’re about to have your balls smashed in by Something Left Unsaid, a metalcore band from Pacifica, CA.

Something Left UnsaidFor fans of Lamb of God, Killswitch Engage, Trivium, Shadows Fall, God Forbid, etc.

Sometimes it seems like there’s a real lack of good shredding in metal today. Something Left Unsaid fills that void with hard-hitting, chunky rhythms, technical leads, and insane solos that will make babies cry (I can literally hear a baby crying right now as I listen to this band and write this spotlight). SLU comes out of Pacifica, starting out as two close friends collaborating tracks online and in just less than a year they solidified a lineup, released an EP, and are working on a full length entitled Deconstructionism. They are definitely a mosh-worthy band dedicated to the art of metal.

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2011 NHL Playoffs: Round 3

2011 NHL Playoffs Conference Finals

The Conference Semifinals were INTENSE. We had two sweeps in the Eastern Conference: the Tampa Bay Lightning swept the Washington Capitals, and the Boston Bruins, with Tim Thomas’ god like performance, swept the Philadelphia Flyers. In the Western Conference, the Vancouver Canucks beat the Nashville Predators in 6, and the Sharks…oh boy, our Sharks. I love ’em, I have a ton of confidence in them, but damn do they make me nervous sometimes.

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23 Days with the Motorola Atrix 4G

Motorola Atrix 4G

I’ve had an iPhone 3G for the past 21 months. The last 12 of those months have been irritating, annoying, frustrating and inconvenient thanks to Apple and the iOS4. I thought “Oh cool, an update to iOS4 for my phone…it should make improvements!” Wrong! It slowed my phone down so much that, at times, it was almost unusable. It shouldn’t take three minutes to type out “Hey man where are you?”. After a few updates with minimal improvements, I went to my local Apple store to see what I could do about it:

“Hey my phone is messed up because of your update, how do I go back to iOS3?”

“Sorry sir, you can’t revert back to iOS3 once iOS4 is installed”

“So you can’t fix it? I can barely use this thing”

“Well you can replace it for $200, but at that point you might as well get the iPhone 4”

“Or I can get an Android…”

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2011 NHL Playoffs: Round 2

NHL Playoffs 2011 Round 2

We’re already one game into Round 2 of the 2011 NHL playoffs and our San Jose Sharks begin their series against the Detroit Red Wings tonight. I just want to say: DAMMIT I LOVE PLAYOFFS HOCKEY! Every game that I’ve been able to watch, I’ve been glued to my TV and they’ve all been great games. All of the blood, sweat, and tears that goes into every game and every series is so addicting. I had my phone set to send me updates for pretty much every scoring change for nearly every game, which made me sound very popular for the past week and a half.

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Mortal Kombat: Back-Back-Punch is Still Scorpion’s Harpoon!

We all have memories as kids playing Mortal Kombat, whether we were at home playing it on Sega Genesis/Super Nintendo, or in the arcade because your parents wouldn’t let you own it due to the titillating amount of gore and the arcade was the only place you could get away with playing it other than your friend’s house, and he always whooped your sorry ass because he owned it.  Whatever it was, the Mortal Kombat franchise has a ton of nostalgic value to lifelong gamers, a huge fan base, and probably two of the most badass characters in fighting game history: Scorpion and Sub-Zero. The latest installment, a “reboot” of the franchise and game debut from NetherRealm Studios, makes us feel like we’re 7 years old all over again.

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NHL: 2011 Playoff Predictions

2011 NHL Playoffs

Most of us here at Wrecked are avid sports fans. Mostly Hockey ’cause it’s the most bad-ass of all sports. Fuck Football. (Editor’s note: No, Sean, fuck you!) So with playoff excitement and booze running through our blood, here are our playoff brackets with our first round predictions. We’ll be analyzing our predictions after each round and see who still has a job here at Wrecked… cause if you’re wrong, you get fired. Rules are rules.

We also strongly encourage anyone willing to take on the Wrecked staff to post your own predictions in the comment section below. Half the fun of sports is talking shit, making wild predictions, and arguing about stats, so bring it on!

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San Jose Sharks: A Quick Comparison

San Jose Sharks WRECKED

With the 2010-2011 NHL regular season coming to a close, it’s time to put out a few comparisons, observations, and maybe a rant or two about our beloved San Jose Sharks.

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Get Dirty. Get Ike’s.

Ike's Place - San Francisco

A sandwich is easily the most versatile food. Nearly any ingredient can be eaten on or properly paired with a sandwich, but how often is a sandwich so good it makes you feel like you can see God? With only 3 locations, not often enough.

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